58 results for tag: Shelly

A Prayer for the One Who Feels Alone

Dear Grieving Mama, Do you feel alone? I felt an aloneness that permeated to the core of my bones when my son was stillborn. My husband had to go home to be with our daughters and the nurses moved me to the end of the hall so I wouldn’t hear the other babies crying for their moms when it was time to nurse. Instead of snuggling a newborn baby, I lay alone in a bed with grief deeper than I thought possible. As the moments turned into hours and the hours into days, the fog of grief lifted and I remembered I was never alone. My Lord Jesus was always with me. He wrapped me in His loving embrace as I slept that first night. He restored my joy in the ...

Beyond the Grave

For you will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave. -Psalm 16:10 A cool breeze blew this morning as I sat on my back porch with a friend and listened to her pour her heart out about her adult children and the trials they are experiencing. Our mama hearts hurt together but we encouraged each other to keep trusting the Lord and talked about His faithfulness even in the trials. As a Hope Mommy, I have often been told to rejoice because my child is in heaven. And I do. And I hurt because my child is not with me here on earth. I didn’t get to rock him to sleep, to teach him to tie his shoes, to take his prom ...

I Will Not Be Shaken

I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken. -Psalm 16:8 I have set the Lord always before me. That sounds kind of churchy and odd, doesn’t it? Who talks like that? I think David was saying, “I’m keeping my focus on the Lord. I’m putting Him first and looking to Him in all things.” We all have things in our lives that bring us to what I call the faith barrier. It’s what makes us question if God is there, if He cares about us, if He loves us, and if He really is a good, good Father. We wonder how God could let our child die (or another devastating event) if He really cares and is good. I ...

Discussions in Grief: Withdrawn

Grieving involves new emotions and considerations often too many to numbers. When you find yourself in overwhelming grief, you likely feel buried and lost. In this series, we slowly and compassionately look at one aspect of grief at a time from a biblical perspective for the newly grieving mother. Click {here} to read past posts in this series.  I don’t mind going to the dentist, but some of my friends and family avoid it. I avoid traffic, but I have friends who are completely unaffected by the stress of bumper-to-bumper cars and enjoy the time alone and the chance to catch up on phone calls or listen to podcasts. Whenever there is ...

Discussions in Grief: Stunned

Grieving involves new emotions and considerations often too many to numbers. When you find yourself in overwhelming grief, you likely feel buried and lost. In this series, we slowly and compassionately look at one aspect of grief at a time from a biblical perspective for the newly grieving mother. Click {here} to read past posts in this series.  Less than twenty-four hours after uttering the words, “I’m trying to finish his quilt because I think I might be going into labor,” I looked at the sonogram monitor and saw all four chambers of his heart. Still. Absolutely still.  I was stunned. Absolutely stunned. We had presents under ...

Cliche Comforts: “Everything Happens For A Reason”

Everything happens for a reason. I heard it when my son died and I heard a young mother say it the other day. I didn’t like it 26 years ago when someone said it to me, and it still rubbed me wrong the other day. I know the young mom who just buried her child had probably been told that and she was just repeating it. I didn’t have a good response at the time, but that phrase has been banging around in my head for a few weeks now.  Here’s what I wish I had replied to that hurting mom. I wish I had told her I don’t know why babies die and cannot figure out a good reason for it, but I do know God can take even the worse situation and use it for ...

Comfort For Hope Siblings: God Is Always With You

One of the hardest things we, as Hope Moms, have to do after loss is try to reconcile how a good God can let bad things happen. Trying to help our Hope Siblings understand such a hard reality is equally, if not more, difficult. But it is vital we parent our children through the hardship of loss with God’s truth.   Last weekend I was at a church service and we sang a song with these lyrics:  And all my life You have been faithful And all my life You have been so, so good With every breath that I am able Oh, I will sing of the goodness of God I stood there singing those words between two of my girls who are Hope Siblings. As I sang the words, I ...

Discussions in Grief: Waves

Grieving involves new emotions and considerations often too many to numbers. When you find yourself in overwhelming grief, you likely feel buried and lost. In this series, we slowly and compassionately look at one aspect of grief at a time from a biblical perspective for the newly grieving mother. Click {here} to read past posts in this series.  One of my favorite memories as a child was going to the coast with my parents. My mother loved to play in the ocean and we spent hours splashing in the waves. When I lived near the Gulf of Mexico, a group of us went to the coast nearly every week. Sometimes we played on the shore and let the waves ...

Discussions in Grief: Anger

Grieving involves new emotions and considerations often too many to numbers. When you find yourself in overwhelming grief, you likely feel buried and lost. In this series, we slowly and compassionately look at one aspect of grief at a time from a biblical perspective for the newly grieving mother. Click {here} to read past posts in this series.  Anger. It is a part of the grief process. When we grieve, we are supposed to experience anger... at least that's what the "experts" tell us. I do not consider myself an angry person, so when the son my husband and I desired so deeply was born still nine days before his due date, I wasn’t ...

Purpose in the Pain: Genuine Faith

I remember a conversation I had with a woman in my church who mentored me in the early days of my young marriage. She had several young children at the time, and one of her sons had been diagnosed with cancer. As she described the sadness and difficulty of their situation, she commented that while it was painful, she and her husband were grateful for the opportunity for their faith to be proven genuine. As they pressed on through the difficulty, they knew that their faith and trust in God was pleasing to Him. My friend was living and breathing 1 Peter 1:6-7, which says, “​​In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, ...