101 results for tag: Miscarriage
I have felt the pull on my heart to share my story. I have tried to avoid it, but over and over the Lord is pushing me to share what He is teaching me.
Last March, after more than a year of trying to start a family, we found out I was pregnant. While I was excited, something seemed to keep me from being overly excited. Then, a few weeks after finding out I was pregnant, I had a miscarriage.
I was angry and heartbroken. I felt embarrassed and confused. Mostly, I was in pain. I took multiple showers, because laying on the floor of my shower until the hot water ran out was the best comfort I could find. My tears flowed with the shower water, and ...
“God, please cradle my fragile heart and remind me that its ok to love and accept the child within me.”
These are the words I wrote in my prayer journal the night before I found out that my baby had no heartbeat. Weeks had gone by that I carried this baby with no beating heart. These very same words I had written the night before, became the immediate first words I heard in my mind when the ultrasound tech said, “I’m sorry.” Even before those words left her mouth, I couldn’t look at the monitor. The anxiety and fear of losing another baby less than six months apart was just too much.
Five minutes later, I was dabbing a tissue into each ...
"May this be your experience; may you feel that the Hand which inflicts the wound supplies the balm, and that He who has emptied your heart has filled the void with Himself." - Hudson Taylor, missionary to China
If I'd written my own life story a hundred different times in a hundred different ways, I never would have included this chapter: Our Second Miscarriage.
Back in January, Shawn and I were elated to read an instantly positive pregnancy test. Pregnancy symptoms set in quickly and we couldn't wait to hold our third sweet baby in September.
Fast forward a few weeks. ...
In 27 years, I had never been to the emergency room. I had no idea that in the span of three days, I would visit the emergency room on three occasions. In 27 years, I had never lost anyone I loved to death. I had no idea that, in those same three days, the first time I would look death in the face, would be when I lost my baby.
How do you share with people that you miscarried? Do you wait for it to come out in awkward conversation? Do you blurt it out to everyone you know? There is no easy way to share the death of a child. We shared our story with family and friends just four days after we announced to everyone we would be ...
I got into my car, shaking, and responded to my doctor’s voicemail requesting me to call her personal line so that I might talk to her that evening. That Friday evening. A week prior to this, I had chosen to take a voluntary, non-invasive blood test on a whim, and some results were flagged.
My doctor mentioned words I had never heard, and I scrambled to write anything down on the back of the one receipt I found. It was my first brush with such grief.
I had experienced some loss before, and had already had a few rocky appointments with my OB. But five days later, I walked into an ultrasound room, watched my sixteen-week-old baby kick and flip ...
Seven Years Later
Her heart was aching and lonely, she felt lost and misunderstood. For months, the heart of this carpenter’s wife, who was not yet a mother in the eyes of the world, grieved the loss of child she never got to meet. No physical scar or sign to hold that would indicate to the world the condition of her heart and how it was left in tiny shards of glass. No one seemed to see the disaster that lay before her. Her heart, once perfectly crafted and beautiful and whole like a lovely porcelain vase, now lay on the ground where common people trekked. Often times, she felt like she was kneeling on the ground, overwhelmed at the destruction ...
My husband Andy and I have two beautiful girls, and we were debating whether or not to have another baby. We didn’t really feel strongly one way or another, but wanted to be obedient to the Lord. So we decided to start trying and see what God had in store for us. The second month of trying and bam! Pregnant. It took 5 or 6 months to get pregnant with the girls and the baby that we named Birch and lost at 9 weeks (between our girls), so we were absolutely shocked. As we wrapped our heads around the idea of being a family of 5, our excitement grew. We dreamed of a little boy or a little girl and thought of names and wondered what this little one ...
I still remember when we announced we were pregnant. We were so excited and blessed to be pregnant with our third child on earth. This would be our fifth time being pregnant. In between our two living children, Addison and Austen, we had lost two babies in a row—10 weeks with the first and 5 weeks with the second. We had experienced losses, so we knew how blessed we were to be pregnant again. My whole pregnancy was going so well. I decided not to do the genetic testing, so instead we were scheduled for an ultrasound. I was 21 weeks. We were so nervous, but our nerves quickly went away when we found out our baby was just perfect. Our baby was growing ...
My husband, Ron, and I have been married for 14 years. We first met in 2003, and we knew instantly that God had brought us together. We were married four months later. We had discussed children and always said it was in God’s hands if or when we had any. When Ron was 18 he had a brain tumor. He had surgery, chemo and radiation—and is completely healed. Because of the chemo and radiation, he was told that chances were pretty high that he wouldn’t be able to have children.
Fast forward eight years, and I wasn’t surprised that we hadn’t conceived yet. We just assumed it was because of the cancer. My sweet husband knew it was a dream of ...
On June 13, 2010, I discovered that I was pregnant with our third child in three years. There was a great deal of shock and restlessness as we began to prepare our home for three babies. My first two pregnancies were textbook and without nausea or complications. So, as my third pregnancy began and the sickness ensued, it was even harder for me to accept that this was God’s plan for me. However, God laid Jeremiah 33:3 on my heart and began to transform my thoughts to His thoughts—“Call to Me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.” We began to digest the reality, and we were ...
