Strength in the Sorrow: Psalm 91:1-7

God’s Word is sufficient for our every need, even those that follow the heartbreaking loss of a child. In this series, Hope Moms share about the way God, through His life-giving Word, has provided them with the strength, comfort, encouragement, and hope they needed as they walk through the valley of loss and grief.
“My soul melts away for sorrow; strengthen me according to Your word!” Psalm 119:28

I sat across from my husband in a McDonalds restaurant booth, my mind in a complete haze. With each sip of my coffee I squinted my eyes to hold back the tears. Just a few moments prior I was walking a cemetery, hand-in-hand with my man, in an attempt to finalize a resting spot for our son, Chance. And before that? Just two days ago? I was admitted to the hospital and labor was induced. I pushed my boy out of my body, held him in my arms, and after a far-too-short five hours, kissed his forehead and said goodbye to my only son. 

At twenty weeks pregnant, we learned Chance’s heart had stopped beating. We had previously lost a baby at nearly nine weeks pregnant and here were were again, facing loss that felt insurmountable. 

With the last sip, I let the tears fall and began to replay the events of the last few days. But I also let my mind ponder God’s faithfulness made evident. Multiple times I asked God to show up. He did. Multiple times I asked God to give water for my dry, parched soul. He did. Multiple times I asked the Holy Spirit to guide me to comfort in God’s Word. He did, and He lead me to Psalm 91:1-7. 

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.’ Surely He will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, then thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you.”

As I transitioned into the stages of deep grief, I referenced these verses from Psalm 91 time and time again. Each promise and truth from the Father brought a new level of comfort and refreshment to my soul and provided a new level of strength in the sorrow. 

v 1 “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”

God revealed to me that even in my grief, I could choose to consciously dwell on the Him—His past faithfulness in my life—and not my circumstances. Yes, allowing my heart to grieve was vital to my healing, yet what was even more vital was feeling rest, even in suffocating pain. I realized the only way to feel true rest in my soul and heart and mind was by dwelling on God and His sovereignty, and not my situation.   

v 2 “I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.’”

I was reminded that, while there was a storm raging in my heart, God was the only safe place of refuge. In times of grief it is important to speak truth over our circumstances, even when we do not feel truth at work. When Chance died, I chose to speak truth, as this verse recommends. Even in my pain I will proclaim that God is my only solid rock. Proclaiming this truth brought strength. 

v 3 “Surely He will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence.”

God is mighty to save. Jesus alone conquered death, and only He could save me from falling into a pit of utter despair. Death knocked at our door, but death did not have the final say because Jesus paid it all on the cross. The cross became my reminder that Jesus cared enough to save me once, and surely He would show up again in my sorrow.  

v 4 “He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.”

This verse brought immense comfort to my weary soul. I pictured myself under His wing, safe from the storm. It also reminded me to look back in order to look ahead in trust. God had shown up time and time again in other adverse circumstances, and remembering His faithfulness in the past allowed a deep peace to wash over my heart in the present. While burying a son was the hardest obstacle I had yet to overcome, God had never let me down before and thus I knew He would not fail me in my grief.  

vv 5-6 “You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday.”

In the months following Chance’s death, night became a trigger of anxiety and stress. It was as if the darkness of night tried to swallow me whole as I was left alone with my thoughts and fears. Yet the Holy Spirit reminded me that if I would continue to cling to God as my refuge, the darkness would not overcome, and that in time, light would break forth and rest would come once again.  

v. 7 “A thousand may fall at your side, then thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you.”

Regardless of what comes my way, regardless of the road ahead, or any future loss, trauma or heartache, I will not be moved. Even though the storms come, God is my protection, shield and refuge. This verse speaks the promise that even when we are asked to walk this road of love and loss, we are still walking, we are still standing, and we will not be destroyed.

Thank you, Jesus, for being our calm from the storm and our refuge in times of trouble. Thank you for taking us under your wing as we grieve in hope. Thank you for the reminder to dwell well on your never-ending faithfulness, love, and protection. Thank you for showing up in a McDonalds booth over coffee three years ago, and giving this Hope Mom strength in her sorrow.

What verses have offered you strength amidst your own sorrow? We’d love to have you share about the truths you have gleaned from God’s Word here.

Brittnie lives in Sugar Land, Texas and enjoys writing on her blog and other outlets, baking, lingering coffee dates, and soaking in moments with her family. She is a wife to Brandon and a mom to Clara, Camille, and Hope Mom to Baby A (Clara’s twin) and Chance. Psalm 62:1-2 is her go to verse when she needs quick encouragement. She is author of Desert Song, and you can visit with Brittnie at her personal blog, A Joy Renewed, where she shares her faith and family, and encourages her readers to claim joy despite circumstance.

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