Jenny’s Story

Just a few months after my husband, Sam, and I were married, we were thrilled to discover we were expectant parents. We immediately began exciting preparations as we embraced pregnancy.  Our hearts were overflowing with gratitude and anticipation for our little bundle of joy. Little did we know that the Lord’s plan was to include painful suffering. Our faith would be put to the test trusting completely in His plan for our family.

Our eighteen-week anatomy scan revealed that our daughter had an abnormal amount of fluid surrounding her brain. We were immediately sent to a maternal fetal specialist. We were overwhelmed with anxiety and questions. How could this be? I was so healthy and everything up to this point was fine. Would I carry her to term? What kind of challenges would she have?

I begged the Lord to heal our daughter and assure us the tests and images were all wrong. We continued to schedule numerous tests, MRIs, doctor appointments, and the highest-level genetic testing available. The doctors could not diagnose what our sweet Mary Grace’s condition was nor could they give us any indications as to her life expectancy. 

Throughout the pregnancy we strived to remain hopeful. We prayed and cried many days and nights for the Lord to heal our sweet Mary Grace. We prayed that her statistics and data were just misinterpreted and that she would overcome all odds. She was a small baby, but such a fighter. Friends and family prayed unceasingly for a healthy pregnancy and delivery.

“For it was You who created my inward parts; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I will praise You because I have been fearfully and wonderfully made.”
Psalm 139:13-14,

We knew our daughter was perfectly made despite the indicated abnormalities. The Lord had made her beautiful in His image. I would pray Psalm 56:3 every time fear gripped me as we waited for her arrival. I knew the Lord had the perfect plans for her life, even if those plans scared us.

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in You.” 
Psalm 56:3

On June 12th, 2018, our precious daughter, Mary Grace, was delivered into the world. We were immediately gripped by fear as she had more complications that the doctors had anticipated.  Minutes passed and we did not hear her cry, not even a whimper. Our situation was dire. I found the courage to begin praying aloud. “Jesus, I trust in you. Jesus, I trust in you. Not my will be done, but yours be done.” 

As uncontrollable tears fell from our faces, we already knew the outcome. We endured five painful, yet beautiful, days as our families poured their love and tears over Mary Grace while she remained on life support in the NICU. 

On the fifth day of Mary Grace’s life, the nurses placed Mary Grace in my arms. It would be the first and last time I would hold my daughter. We watched our precious baby girl leave earth and enter the gates of heaven. At that moment I felt how Mary, the mother of Jesus, must have felt on Calvary as she watched her son slowly take his last breath. 

We shall never understand in this life why the Lord chose to bring Mary Grace into fullness of eternal life with Him so soon. I did not want to let her go. It feels like too much of a sacrifice. I felt like all life’s hope and joy were being buried with her, never to be felt again.

The Lord has been so faithful to my husband and I these past three years. Slowly, we began to open our hearts to experience the beauty, hopes, and joys of life, and I cling to the joy of knowing that we will one day be reunited with Mary Grace in eternity.

“No eye has not seen, or ear has not heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him.”
1 Corinthians 2:9

Jenny is a follower of Christ, wife and mommy to two living children and one in heaven: Claire Marie (age 2), Adam (age 6 months) and Mary Grace. She and her husband reside in Houston, TX. She is a former elementary school teacher and is currently busy raising two kids under two. She enjoys: running, tennis, reading, socializing, explore new places with her toddler and everything Texas.