Honoring Hope Dads This Father’s Day

Sometimes, when we’re grieving, even kind words for those closest to us can be hard to find. But with Father’s Day approaching this Sunday, I want to gently encourage you to remember your husband on this tender day.

Parenting a child in heaven is a heavy burden. Not just for us, but for our husbands, too. Hope Dads often carry sorrow in quiet, unseen ways.

I pray these resources give you a starting place. Below, you’ll find:

• A sample Father’s Day letter to help you speak words of love and encouragement to your husband—thanking him for the ways he’s walked this road of loss with you and pointing him to the Lord for strength and comfort.
• A podcast roundup featuring some of our favorite Hope Dads. Their stories, honesty, and faith are a powerful reminder that fathers grieve deeply too, and that God meets them right in the midst of it.

To my husband this Father’s Day,

I know this isn’t how you envisioned today. How I wish I could change things for you. I know a father’s grief can often get overshadowed by the grief of a mother and I am so sorry. I want you to know that I see you. I understand you are grieving, too. At times, your grief has been hard for me to identify as I have been so immersed in my own, but as we grow forward together, I am hopeful that we can begin to put language around our experiences. I know you might need more or less time than I do before wanting to talk about it, and that’s okay. I pray to be a wife who listens to understand your grief. When I ask questions, may I be gracious, whether you choose to respond or not. I long to keep our communication open and honest. I want to give your grief dignity by not trying to make it look or sound like mine. We experienced the loss of the very same person –our wanted and loved baby– but I know it has been different for each of us.

From the moment I first showed you that pink-lined pregnancy test, your world changed, too. You wondered if you would be a good father. You dreamt of the things you’d teach our little one, and of the ways you’d protect and defend them. You prayed for the new life growing within me. You built a crib, and we bantered about baby names. You drove me to ultrasounds and doctor appointments. You proudly showed off all those precious blurry black and white photos to your friends and co-workers. You researched, purchased, and installed the safest car seat to bring our baby home in. And then, when it all ended, you sat with me in the hospital bed and held my head to your chest as we cried together. I still remember focusing on the rise and fall of your chest, it helped to steady me. Then you held my hand as we drove home with that empty car seat safely in the back…

We might be doing it in our own time and in our own way, but we are working on healing and rebuilding in the name of Jesus, and I thank you for that. You are such a good husband and father. I love you more than ever. Our baby will always be ours. I trust Jesus to hold us, and our marriage, as we grieve, until the day God calls us Home. I pray the Lord gives you peace in your spirit today and may you feel the honor of the title, Dad, because it is proudly yours to wear forever!

All my love,

“Lament is God’s invitation to be honest—you don’t need to silence your questions to sound more spiritual.” – Clint Watkins, Just Be Honest

In this episode, Kristin Hernandez was joined by Hope Dad and author Clint Watkins to talk about lament, biblical grief, and what it means to bring our honest pain before God. Clint shares the story of his babies, Eli and Rowe, and the deep grief he has walked through as a husband and father. Listen in as he shares the difference between groaning and grumbling, and why Scripture invites us to worship through tears.

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“I remember thinking, ‘I don’t know how to be a dad to a baby I can’t hold.’ And yet, God showed me that fatherhood doesn’t end at loss.” – Blair Cushman

In this special episode, Kristin Hernandez sits down with Blair Cushman—Hope Dad to Gwendolyn and Baby C, lead pastor of Redemption Bible Church in New Braunfels, TX, and co-founder of Hope Mommies. Blair shares Gwendolyn’s story from a father’s perspective and offers rich biblical wisdom for grieving dads, as well as for mothers seeking to support their husbands through loss. Whether you are a Hope Dad or love a Hope Dad, this conversation will leave you encouraged and reminded of the hope we have in Christ.

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In our latest episode, Kristin Hernandez was joined by Eric Schumacher to explore the often-overlooked grief of fathers after the loss of a baby. Eric shares his personal story of fatherhood and loss, the challenges men face in expressing sorrow, and how cultural expectations can cause many to grieve in silence. Together, they discuss the importance of honest communication in marriage, the role of the church in supporting grieving families, and how Jesus Himself modeled the need for community in suffering. Eric also offers gentle encouragement to those hesitant to return to church after loss, pointing us to the lasting hope found in the gospel and the promise of resurrection in Christ.

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Jennie is the Executive Director for Hope Mommies. She and her husband Brian live in Washington State and have four children together— Trenton, Paige who has been in Heaven with Jesus since 2010, Mason, and Cora. If you were to knock on her front door today, you’d find her in something comfortable drinking a hot cup of tea, while trying to figure out how to balance all the things that make up a life. She enjoys spending time in God’s word, fresh flowers, board games with her kids, cooking, and evening walks in her neighborhood. She adores being a new creation in Christ and prays she reflects Him well on this earth.