Honoring Him This Father’s Day You See His Grief—And That Matters

I’ve been thinking about Father’s Day and how hard it can be—not just for us, but for the men we love. As Hope Moms, we carry our grief in ways that are often seen—our tears, our words, the way we hold onto memories. But for our husbands, it’s different. Their pain is quieter, often unspoken, but no less deep. Hope Dads often bear the weight of loss in a way the world doesn’t always recognize. 

That’s why I want to encourage you to honor him this Father’s Day. He may not say much, he may not even know how to put words to what he’s feeling, but he is a father. And just like we long for our babies to be remembered, so does he. 

It doesn’t have to be big or elaborate. Maybe it’s just a simple “I see you. I know this day is hard. You are a father, and you always will be.” Maybe it’s setting aside time to talk about your child—say their name, share a memory, or just sit together in the quiet, knowing you both love someone the world doesn’t get to see. Maybe it’s giving him space to grieve in his own way, without pressure or expectation. 

I know this day is painful for you, too. You carry your own grief, but you also carry his—watching the man you love bear a sorrow neither of you can fix. It hurts to see him long for something that should have been his to hold, to protect, to guide. You know how much he wanted to be a father, not just in name, but in every way—the midnight walks through the dimly lit hallway, holding his baby close, listening to soft breaths as they drift back to sleep; the bedtime stories, spoken with love, meant to fill tiny dreams with magic; the quiet dream of chubby legs stumbling forward, reaching for his steady hands. And perhaps what aches the most is knowing how fiercely he loves a child the world doesn’t get to see.

The world may not recognize him as a father, but we do. You do. And more importantly, he is, and always will be, your baby’s dad—forever. 

So even in the pain of this day, let’s remind the Hope Dads in our lives that they are seen, that their love matters, and that they are never alone in this. And please know—you are not alone either. I see you, I’m holding you close in my heart, and I’m walking this road with you. 

With SO much love,
Jennie

Jennie is the Executive Director for Hope Mommies. She and her husband Brian live in Washington State and have four children together— Trenton, Paige who has been in Heaven with Jesus since 2010, Mason, and Cora. If you were to knock on her front door today, you’d find her in something comfortable drinking a hot cup of tea, while trying to figure out how to balance all the things that make up a life. She enjoys spending time in God’s word, fresh flowers, board games with her kids, cooking, and evening walks in her neighborhood. She adores being a new creation in Christ and prays she reflects Him well on this earth.