The Unending and Unchanging Love of Jesus

Aging cross surrounded by flowers in cemetery to the twilight., generative IA

Our life in Christ as believers brings true freedom. Because of this merciful gift of new life, we are absolutely free from the law of sin and death (Romans 8:2), and we no longer live in bondage (Galatians 5:1). Jesus ultimately gives us freedom from suffering eternal death (John 6:47), but His life and resurrection were never meant to provide the same type of deliverance from suffering on earth.

As Hope Mommies, we have realized first hand that we aren’t free from this suffering, because we now know death on earth—not just death that happens near us, but the death of life that began inside us. It’s the kind of suffering that often leads to a “shatter your phone against the tile floor” kind of anger release, or a “taking a shower just to allow the tears to flow more freely” kind of sorrow. It’s the agonizing feeling that comes with every pregnancy announcement and baby bump passing by that Satan uses to whisper, “God forgot all about you.” It’s the unrelenting pain that cries out to God even when there is no palpable answer in return. It’s memories of labor pain that ended with no reward, or the milk let down with no baby to feed. Sometimes it’s even a discreet, internal, and lonely suffering.

Regardless of how your grief played out, our suffering in baby loss is not only deep, but it is wide and far stretching into each area of our life and existence. Even still, God did not promise us freedom from this level of suffering. He offered us so much more: to walk with us through it.

Thankfully, God knew there would be tragedy and trial such as this, so He prompted Paul to teach the church in Rome, and eventually us, about the unending and unchanging love that Jesus gives us in any circumstance.

Throughout the entire eighth chapter of Romans, Paul presents valuable information and how-to instruction on our ability to live freely, apart from the bondage of sin, through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. He ends the chapter by making it clear that this freedom is true in any circumstance and at any time in the believer’s life if they are indeed walking according to the Spirit and not the flesh (Romans 8:1). I encourage you to read through each verse of this chapter with these applications to your grief in mind:

• As believers, we are no longer enslaved to sin and death, but have ultimate freedom in Christ! (8:1-2; compare Romans 6:17)

• Our freedom allows us, through the Spirit, to walk as Christ did despite our grief. (8:3-4)

• Even when we suffer, we can set our mind on the things of the Spirit in order to live accordingly, leading to peace and a life that is pleasing the Lord.  (8:5-7; compare Colossians 3:2)

• Our Father in heaven has adopted us as His children, giving us the freedom to cry out to Him for help instead of living in fear. (8:14-16)

• Our sufferings point us to eternity’s glory because they are merely temporary in comparison. (8:18; compare 2 Corinthians 4:17)

• Experiencing the death of a child teaches us to eagerly await His return and stay faithful to following Him because of the hope that we have been given in Christ. (8:19-25)

• The Spirit helps us where we are weak in our grief, and intercedes when we do not know what to pray. (8:26-27)

• The Lord can work all things together for good, including our immense loss. (8:28)

• God is for us to the point that He spared His own son for our freedom. This reality is still true in our grief. He is for us, therefore, nothing can be against us! (8:31-33)

• It bears repeating twice: The Lord is making intercession specifically for us in our grief in ways nobody else can. (8:34)

• The worst of trials, even the sorrow of baby loss, cannot separate us from the love of Christ; which conversely means our suffering was not a cause of separation from Him either. (8:35)

• Our victory to faithfully follow Christ in the midst of trial will only be through Him, not our own strength. (8:37; compare Phil 4:11-14)

• And finally, nothing can separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus. (8:38-39; compare Ephesians 3:18-19)

Even in the midst of my own distress of loss, there was a brand new, liberating freedom in the reality that He allowed this suffering in my life. This freedom didn’t come because it felt good to suffer, or because following Christ is easy, but because it pointed me to the suffering He already endured in my place, and to the promise that someday He will demolish suffering completely. His promise in Romans 8:38 rang true as He never once left my side through the ugliest, most sinful times of my grief, and while so much surrounding my loss seemed to put me in bondage, I’ve found God’s promises to be my greatest liberation from the pain. He continuously frees me from fear, depression, envy, and loneliness, releasing me into a place of trust, joy, contentment, and comfort as I walk this path of

This is where our freedom lies as believers and as Hope Mommies. We can rest on His finished work and His endless ability to care for and lead us through any circumstance. Let us cling only to what is promised in our suffering, and persevere with hope in the only One who brings complete liberation in this life and for eternity.

Kayla is married to Justin in sunny south Florida where they enjoy life together with friends & family. Kayla is a teacher at heart, nurse by profession, & lover of truth! She serves as a volunteer nurse at her local Care-Net & enjoys women’s ministry discipleship especially in the areas of grief, marriage, & infertility. You can follow more of her musings on grief here. Would you like to contribute a piece of writing to the Hope Mommies blog? We invite you to submit here!