We Are Heard When Sorrow Has No Words

I’ve always liked to talk. Growing up, I could prattle on about various topics, and as an only child, there was no one there to stop me. My parents were a captive audience to all my daily accounts, questions, and dreams. In college, my favorite course was speech. A class where I could get up and talk, and others sat there and listened. Words came easily (sometimes too easily). Words never failed me until my daughter died.

When we found out Kinley would never breathe on her own, I had plenty to say to God. I cried, I yelled, and I pleaded for a miracle. After Kinley died, my voice fell silent. I no longer had the words. My sorrow was too great, and I was angry. I no longer felt like speaking to God. I had poured my heart out to Him, and His response was silence. I had begged for my child’s life, and He had remained unmoved. What more was there left to say?

My ache was too strong to suppress. I needed words. I needed comfort. I needed hope. So, I turned to the Word. I might not have been on speaking terms with the Lord, but I craved answers. I longed for encouragement. I felt so empty.

The Bible is God’s words to us. I no longer had the words to say, but He did. God’s words poured into my soul—replacing lies with the truth, soothing my sorrows, and offering hope instead of despair. I was not speaking to God, but I was listening.

When our whole world has been turned upside down, we can grab hold of His promises. God’s Word is filled with His pledges of faithfulness to us. God doesn’t promise us a carefree life, but He guarantees us His presence and victory through Him.

“My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.”
Psalm 119:50 NIV

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
John 16:33 NIV

God hears us when we have no words. He hears the cry of our hearts. God gave us His Holy Spirit to serve as an intercessor between God and us. Even in the silence, the Spirit speaks on our behalf.

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.”
Romans 8:26 NIV

“The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. What we have received is not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may understand what God has freely given us. This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words.”
1 Corinthians 2:10-13 NIV

God’s Word and Spirit are blessings to us, ones we might have missed if it weren’t for the silence of our voice. Too often, our prayers are consumed with requests and worries. We fail to read His Word and listen for His voice. In listening, we discover God’s character, which does not change according to our circumstances. We know Him better and realize how well He knows us.

“You have searched me, Lord,
and You know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
You perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
You are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
You, Lord, know it completely.
Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, You are there.”
Psalm 139:1-4, 7-8 NIV

It’s such a comfort to know that God knows me. There isn’t anywhere that I can go that hides me from Him. He sees me. He is with me. He “gets me” like no one else can. In my deepest hurt, God has not abandoned me, but He has held me. God hears my cries. He allows me to rant and rave or to be completely silent. God ministers through His Spirit and speaks through His Word.

In those times, where sorrow has no words, God pours Himself into us. We are empty but He fills us with what we lack and what we long for—peace, joy, and hope. Sweet sister, I know that intense ache in your heart. I’ve had that lump in your throat that makes communicating with God feel impossible. I’ve experienced that anger that burns inside, making you feel like you could explode at any moment.

And God knows too.

He created you and your precious Hope Baby. When your mouth fails, let your ears take over. In the days following Kinley’s death, I turned my ear to God’s Word. These are the verses I read:

“See, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind. But be glad and rejoice forever in what I will create, for I will create Jerusalem to be a delight and its people a joy. I will rejoice over Jerusalem and take delight in my people; the sound of weeping and of crying will be heard in it no more. ‘Never again will there be in it an infant who lives but a few days.’”
Isaiah 65:17-20 NIV

We may not know what to say, but God does. Listen as He speaks, and find the comfort your heart desires.

Stephanie Blanks is married to Matt and has four children: Lyston (9), Kinley (who went home to Jesus in 2011), Levi (6), and Leighton (4). Stephanie works at the Chamber of Commerce in her small town of Hondo, TX. She enjoys singing in her church praise band, running, reading, and spending time with her family at the lake. You can read more from Stephanie on her blog.