The Road to Gratitude

It was late on a Friday evening in January. I was sitting in a chapel with dozens of high school students at a winter retreat, thankful for the dim lighting that hid the tears that were streaming down my face. Just a few hours earlier I had been told that my baby’s heart was no longer beating.

The worship team began playing, and soon the room was filled with the sound of voices lifted up in praise. I robotically formed the words of each song on my lips, but I was numb to what was taking place around me. Inside, I was crying out to the Lord, mourning the death of the child that I still carried within me.

The next morning we gathered together again for a time of worship. Through eyes blurred with tears, I read the lyrics of the first song as they came across the screen.

The sun comes up, it’s a new day dawning
It’s time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass and whatever lies before me,
Let me be singing when the evening comes

What had passed was the death of my baby, and what lie before me was life on earth without her in my arms. The weight of this reality was excruciating, and I did not want to be singing.

Bless the Lord, O my soul,
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before, O my soul
I’ll worship Your holy name

I spoke these words to my heart as I sang them, reminding myself of what I ought to be doing—worshiping the Lord with sincere thanksgiving. But in that moment, I was being just like the Pharisees that Jesus exhorted in Matthew 15—honoring God with my lips, while my heart remained distant, overshadowed by sorrow.

You’re rich in love and You’re slow to anger
Your name is great and Your heart is kind
For all Your goodness, I will keep on singing
Ten thousand reasons for my heart to find

The words flowed from my lips, and I paused, convicted. How could I let my grief stand in the way of my worship? No depth of sorrow could outweigh the countless reasons I had to keep singing. My pain was great, but He was greater still. Even in the valley, God was worthy to be praised.

As the weekend went on, I found that as I chose to continue singing, I was being strengthened to truly praise God, not merely from my lips, but from the depths of my soul. Even though my heart was burdened and the words did not come easily, I continued to offer God my sacrifice of praise, and He continued to plant seeds of gratitude in my heart.

“Through Him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge His name.”
-Hebrews 13:15

A sacrifice is a profession to God that He is worthy, but it is also, by definition, costly. Perhaps, like me, there have been moments in your grief when praising God did not come easily. Perhaps it still doesn’t or never has. How can you praise God when your heart is aching? How can today truly be filled with thanksgiving when your arms are empty?

The answer is found in the first two words of Hebrews 13:15. Through Him.

Through Christ, we can have hearts full of gratitude, even when it feels like the world is crashing down around us. Because Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice—at the cost of His own life—we can choose to praise even in the midst of our sorrow. His death on the cross is the very reason we can sing. For, through His death and resurrection, we have been offered new life in Him—and our response to such a sacrifice made on our behalf ought to be that of praise.

A sacrifice of praise is believing that despite the ache in our hearts His arms are always there working all things out for His glory and our good. It’s laying down your burdens so you can raise your hands in gratitude to the One who is worthy.

The road to gratitude begins with the cultivation of a heart that stands in awe of God. And from a life overflowing with gratitude comes an outpouring of praise. In order for gratitude to be sustained, it must be driven by the reflection of who God is and what He has done. The more we recognize the works of His mighty hands and resolve to magnify His name, the more His joy will be as an ocean that keeps washing onto the shores of our hearts until it has penetrated even the furthest recesses of our souls.

As we are breathing out thanks to God we are breathing in hope. Hope—like oxygen—that we cannot move forward without. And as we continue to be “rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as [we] were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness” (Col. 2:7), we will find the strength to face the days ahead.

Sweet momma, on this Thanksgiving day will you offer up your sacrifice of praise to the Lord? Perhaps right now your heart feels far from Him. But as you continue to allow His praise to flow from your lips, His Spirit will begin a work in you—causing your heart to echo the fruit of your lips—and in praising Him you will find great joy.

“I will praise the name of God with a song; I will magnify Him with thanksgiving.”
Psalm 69:30

“Because Your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise You.So I will bless You as long as I live; in Your name I will lift up my hands.”
Psalm 63:3-4