You Don’t Have to Be Enough
From the moment I realized my baby wouldn't live, I felt my utter inadequacy as a mom. Cries I would never be able to comfort. A face I would never fully memorize. Milestones I would never get to celebrate. Questions I couldn't answer, for myself or for anyone else. And underneath all of it, the weight of watching the world move on without her in it. I lived with the nagging fear that I was broken. That somehow, in the most important thing I had ever been asked to do, I wasn't enough.
Maybe you've felt that too. Maybe loss has left you wondering if you failed your baby, ...
He Restores My Soul: What Does That Really Mean?
After our Leadership Summit this May, when our team chose He Restores My Soul as the theme for our 2027 retreat, I came home and began praying slowly through Psalm 23. I found myself reading it over and over again, lingering on familiar words that I've known for years, and asking the Lord to help me see them with fresh eyes. As I did, I kept coming back to one simple question.
What does it actually mean that He restores my soul?
If I'm honest, there have been seasons in my own grief when those words felt almost impossible to reconcile with my reality, because my ...
In His Hands
In his hand are the depths of the earth; the heights of the mountains are his also. The sea is his, for he made it, and his hands formed the dry land.
Psalm 95:4-5
Oh, Hope Mom,
There are so many mysteries that belong to God alone. While we can truly know Him through His Word, through prayer, through worship, and through life with His people, we will never fully comprehend the fullness of who He is or the wisdom with which He governs every detail of our lives.
After loss, that reality can feel especially difficult. When your baby has died, God's purposes can feel ...
Death Is Not the Last Word
Before Paige died, death was something I knew existed, but it wasn't something I spent much time thinking about. I had been to funerals. I had lost great-grandparents and a few people I knew, but death still felt distant. It belonged to other families and other stories. I knew one day I would have to face it, but I never imagined it would come so soon or so close.
Then, one ordinary summer day, everything changed. Without warning, death entered my own story. It came into my womb, into my family, and into the life of my daughter. From that day forward, death was no ...
Sixteen Years Later
Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves aren't the whole story.
Last week, our family remembered sixteen years since Paige's birth and death. Sixteen years. Sometimes that feels impossible to say out loud. People occasionally ask me if grief gets easier with time, and I never quite know how to answer that. There are certainly things that change, but I don't think healing has looked the way I imagined it would when I was thirty years old. If anything, these last sixteen years have shown me how patient the Lord is. I'm still learning things today that I couldn't have ...
Retreat Registration Is Now Open: He Restores My Soul
There are some passages of Scripture that become especially precious after the death of a baby. Not because we hadn't read them before, but because grief has a way of opening our eyes to truths we never knew we would need quite so desperately. In suffering, verses we've read a hundred times suddenly become lifelines, and promises we once appreciated become the very words that carry us through another day.
Psalm 23 has become one of those passages for me and the other women on our team. It's only six verses long, yet I don't know of another chapter in ...
Join Us This October: Three Ways to Bring Hope
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. It's a time when we pause to remember our babies, raise awareness, and share the hope of Christ with families walking through unimaginable loss. Because this month shines a brighter light on the reality of pregnancy and infant loss, it has also become one of Hope Mommies' two largest fundraising seasons each year, second only to our year-end giving campaign.
This October, we're hosting fundraising events in Washington, California, and Texas. While each event serves a unique community, they all share the same purpose: ...
Ministry Spotlight: One Year Closer Box
Over the years, I've noticed something about my own grief. The days leading up to Paige's birthday are often harder for me than her birthday itself. As June turns to July and August approaches, I find myself carrying a heaviness that is difficult to explain. I remember exactly where I was when we learned her heart had stopped beating. That moment is frozen in time. I remember the questions that flooded my mind then and the ones that still occasionally resurface now.
What happened?
Why did this happen?
If I had gone to the doctor the week before when I wasn't feeling ...
Grief Slows Us Down
After the death of Aaron (who was Moses’ brother and the high priest of Israel) Scripture gives us a glimpse into the way God’s people made space for mourning.
.…And Aaron died there on the top of the mountain… And when all the congregation saw that Aaron had perished, all the house of Israel wept for Aaron thirty days.
Numbers 20:28-29
Thirty days is such a specific amount of time. Scripture could have simply said that Israel mourned Aaron, but instead, God gives us a number. A measured period that was set apart for grief, and not just for a few people ...
Lies in Grief: God Failed Me
Welcome back to our Lies in Grief series. During this series, we’ve covered lies about our bodies, our sin, our blame, our faith and our worthiness to grieve when it comes to baby loss. This final week in our series, we will tackle lies about God’s character that arise in our grief, and learn how to hold fast to His goodness when our hearts are broken.
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In previous weeks, I shared about how we can falsely conclude our sin or our prayer life are to blame for our babies’ deaths. If you are resolved that it’s not your fault your baby died, it would be ...
