Joy Comes in the Morning

Often I feel as though my outside and inside are experiencing a considerable disconnect. Underneath the clean house, washed hair, completed tasks, and plastered smile is concealed irritations, guarded insecurities, hushed up disappointment, and a near constant battle to truly believe that God is enough in the midst of my suffering.

But I shrug off this glaring inconsistency in my own life because I see you there too. In fact, I think that’s where most of us are dwelling. Shoveling on smiles to cover the ache inside. Labeling ourselves as “fine” and “good” when asked how we are doing—as if those words will serve to patch up our brokenness.

I think to myself, “This is just what you do. Cover up the mess inside. Don’t burden others with your ugly day. Don’t let them see the ache, or the undone, or the weariness pent up inside of you. Show them that you can be strong, you can rise above the grief and fear, and the endless sea of questioning.” And all the while I make sure I paste on a smile to prove to everyone that I am full of joy. Or maybe I am just trying to prove it to myself.

That is where we have gone so terribly wrong. Our strength should not be defined by how well we can cope with our sorrow. Joy is not a mask that can be thrown on as you run out the door.

When Israel had completed rebuilding the walls around Jerusalem after their exile, Ezra read to them from God’s Word. The Levites were also there helping the people understand what was being read. Nehemiah writes that the people responded by worshipping God…and then they all began to weep. He tells them, “Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength” (Nehemiah 8:1-10).

He didn’t say your sufficiency is your strength –or- your accomplishments are your strength -or- your resiliency is your strength. Yet, so often we succumb to those lies. My strength lies in my ability to do enough, be enough, endure enough.

What if we chose to find our strength in His perfect sufficiency and eternal sovereignty instead?

I think then that all of the joy that we so often pretend to have would truly be felt in the deepest parts of our souls.

Because Christ himself tells us that in obeying His Word and abiding in His love we will find that His abounding joy remains in us. “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love.  I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete” (John 15:9-11).

As we continue to abide in the One who sustains and upholds us, His abundant  joy will overflow within us. I’ve come to realize that on those days when I don’t feel joy, it’s because I haven’t really chosen it. I have been burying it beneath my own meager efforts to find happiness and completeness in the chaos. But really, isn’t choosing joy all about choosing Jesus? Isn’t finding joy the result of seeing Jesus in every moment of our lives?

Joy in knowing that I am covered by His grace.
Joy in surrendering to God’s desires and purposes for my life.
Joy in knowing that my eternal hope was bought by His precious blood.

So when my days are weighed down by grief and disappointment, I fix my eyes not on the storm but on the One who carries me through it, and remember, just as David said in the Psalms, that “weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning”(Psalm 30:5). And accompanying that joy—the joy of my Lord—is my strength.