Feed Your Soul: The Glory to Come, Part I {Grief & Hope}

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.
2 Corinthians 4:17

 

There is something that far outweighs baby loss. This statement is tremendously difficult to believe because this experience is weighty.

 

If you are like me, this is how you feel:

 

This is the weightiest experience of your life.  You were not prepared in advance for the loss of your child.  This child was within you; his or her body could grow because yours sustained him or her.  And so, when your child ceased to grow or your child’s heart ceased to beat, in a sense, you ceased too. The physical cause for your child’s life to end, whether explained or unexplained, seems to have seeped into your own body.  Even if you may not like to think about it or talk about it, death has become a new kind of reality to you.

 

Death was something distant—a sorrowful concern for the elderly and terminally ill, and perhaps something for you. But the end of your life seemed so far off that it did not often cross your mind. But death was never for your child. Now this has all changed. Never could this reality be imagined in advance: that death could look like this—that it could cover a child. And, in a way, you know you will live with death for the rest of your life.

 

Perhaps you have felt like this too. I am grieved anyone else ever has.

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Hope Mommies doctrinal statement on grief:

GRIEF: We believe that grief is a valid emotion and necessary response to loss in every believer’s life. Jesus Christ himself experienced grief, as did King David and many other persons recorded in Scripture. God promises to be near to the grieving and provides comfort and hope through His Spirit, His Word and fellow believers. We are to “weep with those weep.” (Ps. 34:17-19, 43:5, 88:8-9; Is. 53:3-4; John 11:1-46, 16: 5-9, 19-22; 2 Sam. 12:15-23; Jer. 8:18; Zec 12:10; Rom. 12:15)

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So, how is baby loss possibly “light and momentary” when you know that your life will never be the same, never be what it once was or would have been? The weight is crushing, never light. The days are dim because you are living with death as a part of your life.  The emotions that grief takes you through resemble the moment of loss: uncontrollable. “Momentary” has no home in your vocabulary about grief and longing. Sorrowfully, the only way you know how to apply that word to your circumstances is concerning your child’s earthly life. Right now is when this passage is to be read—this is not a minute too soon: “For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison,” (2 Corinthians 4:17).

 

In grief, I hope.

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Hope Mommies doctrinal statement on hope:

HOPE OF THE BELIEVER: We believe that the hope of the believer lies solely in Christ and His promises towards us. Hope has a forward-looking aspect of greater things to come, which is ultimately fulfilled in heaven. Because of Christ, believers have hope while on earth in God’s goodness, faithfulness, nearness, provision, salvation, love, justice, mercy, grace, kindness, and sovereignty. (Ps. 121; Rom. 8:24-25; Col. 1:5, 26-27; 1 Tim. 1:1; Tit. 2:13; Heb. 6:19; 1 Peter 1:3, 13)

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What this passage communicates is striking, and it must not be missed. If these days of baby loss can be considered “light and momentary,” then can you imagine how valuable, weighty, beautiful, and lasting heaven will be?  Scripture calls for no exceptions here. Baby loss due to miscarriage, stillbirth, or loss after birth are included in the scope of this verse. Compared to heaven, this is light. This is momentary.

 

The believer’s truer reality exists in another glorious place. Heaven may be invisible, but it is more real than this world. Oh yes, and it is far better too—gloriously better. The Scriptural concept of glory is derived from the concept of weight, heaviness, and gravity.  The “glory” of heaven seems to be connected with “weight,” as in “weight of splendid worthiness.”[1] In a manner that cannot even be compared with earth and earthly sorrows, heaven is replete with this profound worth. When this life loses meaning, by comparison the next one will have infinite meaning. When this life loses depth, by comparison the next one will have infinite depth. When this life is fragile and fleeting, the next life is infinitely stable. It has this weight. We will need to be remade with new bodies to even survive the superlatively worthy weight of this place we are destined to live. So, when you cast your expectations upon the place that is to come—expectations that your experience not hold these kind of tears, this kind of emptiness and longing, this kind of loss—do not for a moment fear that heaven will bend or buckle from the pressure of your rising expectations. You cannot cast any expectation of goodness there that is not already planned for you and, know this, that is not already experienced by your child.

 

When your circumstances have revealed to you how sorrowful life on this earth can be, then, suddenly, those expectations for the next life do build and build.  When you know the depths of what child loss feels like, when you know all of the wrong that must be made right, all of the hurt that must be overcome, and the burden of death to overthrow, then you have a deeply-felt, personal need for heaven to be good, perfect, and true. Considering these rising expectations and needs, you are as prepared as possible to appreciate heaven. That is right. This very minute when your requirements for the next life are mounting is the very time when you can best appreciate that heaven will not disappoint you. Scripture promises that heaven will deliver. It will withstand the weight. In fact, it will more than withstand it. You do not even know how to hope for all that heaven will be. Heaven will greatly supersede all of your hopes.

 

Eternal glories will outweigh this most weighty experience of your life. And you, child of the living God, will experience it such that when you are there in that great, future day, you will agree with the Scriptures that the earthly loss of your baby was, indeed, “light and momentary” by comparison. Heaven is heavy with everything good. This truth of Scripture does nothing to minimize the intensity and tragedy of the loss that you have now experienced.  Rather, it does everything to maximize within the deepest part of the heart, the marvelous reality that is to come through Christ.

 

[1] Carpenter, Eugene E., and Philip W. Comfort. Holman Treasury of Key Bible Words: 200 Greek and 200 Hebrew Words Defined and Explained. Nashville, TN: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 2000.

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The “Feed Your Soul” blog series takes the bereaved mother through Scriptural doctrines, which are beautiful truths preserved through the ages by God’s sovereignty to be food for her soul as she grieves.

Read the past posts in this series:

Feed Your Soul: God are You Silent? {Bible}

Feed Your Soul: Where Can I Find Rest? {The Godhead & The Father}

Feed Your Soul: Eternity at Stake {Man & Hell}

Feed Your Soul: Between Now and Eternity {The Holy Spirit & Assurance}

Feed Your Soul: From Shadows to Singing {Church Ordinances}

Feed Your Soul: Mothers Suffering Well {Sanctification, The Responsibility of the Believer, & Suffering}

Feed Your Soul: Hallowed Days {Future Events, Afterlife}

Feed Your Soul: Not Angels, Children of God {Angels}

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