Discussions in Grief: Serve
Grieving involves new emotions and considerations often too many to numbers. When you find yourself in overwhelming grief, you likely feel buried and lost. In this series, we slowly and compassionately look at one aspect of grief at a time from a biblical perspective for the newly grieving mother. Click {here} to read past posts in this series.
When I got pregnant, I quit my full-time job to become a part time writer and stay at home mom. Little did I know, my plan was about to be derailed. The book I had started was about body image and loving the bod God gave you! It was going to be lighthearted and funny. This is how I will serve God’s Kingdom! I thought.
Then we lost our first baby at eleven weeks. And our second. And our third. Each loss pulled me deeper into grief. Loss. Pain. Heartache.
My writing skills (especially the clever ones) moved to Timbucktoo and my book fell apart. I felt purposeless. But God had a purpose. Not for one moment did He stop pursuing me or calling me to serve Him.
At times, I felt like I was hanging on by a thread relationally, spiritually, and emotionally. How could I serve God when I was hurting so intensely? But then it hit me. This. Our loss and grief was the very thing He was asking me to serve Him with.
The Lord spoke tenderly to me, as maybe He is to you right now. “I want to use this story. I want you to speak hope into the tender places in people. Your grief holds a precious place to serve in the kingdom.” As useless as I felt at the time, I wasn’t. God was working on my heart so I could pour out someday from the strength He supplied.
My eyes were opened to a huge void in my city: there was no hope-filled, Christ-centered support group for bereaved mothers. God was calling me to minister to the broken with the hope of Christ because I knew brokenness like the back of my hand. Through a failed adoption and three more miscarriages, we went on to have three beautiful children to raise on earth. And so many other beautiful things were born out of the struggle too: opportunities to share our faith, my first book, lifelong friendships, and the Bearing Hope Support Group which has been meeting for over two years.
Every month, eyes wet with tears, I walk out of that support group knowing that my losses have been infused with meaning and purpose.
“Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered.”
-Proverbs 11:25
The sorrow you know, and your commitment to faith through it, gives you a unique opportunity to touch people with the hope of Christ. Some days, the strength to serve isn’t there. Grace upon grace, sister. There will come a day when you will have energy and strength to serve again. Rest. Breathe. Don’t rush it. But when that day comes, we pray that you will be bold and transparent with your journey.
“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
-Isaiah 41:10
This world desperately needs to know that true hope, joy, peace, comfort, and contentment are only found in the giver of life Himself. No one or nothing else has the power to serve or save like the gospel of Jesus Christ. He is the reason we even have the word hope in our vocabulary.
“In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.”
-Matthew 5:16
My first published book wasn’t the one I originally planned, but it’s still one that’s very much laced with redemptive hope. Bearing Hope: Navigating the Desert of Waiting for a Child came out in August of 2016. All glory to God!
“Only fear the Lord and serve Him faithfully with all your heart. For consider what great things He has done for you.”
-1 Samuel 12:24
- Liv
Hope Mom to Six Precious Babies
Liv is a Midwest native who loves Jesus and is head over heels with her hubby of eight years. She is passionate about bearing and sharing hope with those walking through the darkness of waiting for a child. Liv stays at home with her three miracle babes, but on the side she’s an avid writer, yoga instructor, public speaker and (slow) runner. On any given day, you might find her rocking out to worship songs in the kitchen, braving playdates with her toddlers, or chugging coffee. She heavily relies on her people, The Word, date nights, and foodie food to keep her sane. She sneaks away to write at livryan.com.
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