Christmas Eve – Rain
“… the virgin’s name was Mary. And he came to her and said, ‘Greetings, O favored one, the Lord is with you!’ But she was greatly troubled at the saying, and tried to discern what sort of greeting this might be. And the angel said to her, ‘Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call His name Jesus.’”
Luke 1:27-31
Mary was chosen by God to be the mother of Jesus, our Savior. She was called to carry, birth, and mother the Messiah. What a weighty responsibility that is to uphold. Her graceful response to His calling on her life is one that I endeavor to mimic when God leads me into the crashing waves of obedience.
“And Mary said, ‘Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to Your word.’”
Luke 1:38
Scripture paints a beautiful picture of Mary submitting her life to being a servant of the Lord, but Scripture doesn’t elaborate on the emotions she experienced along the way. Romans 3:23 tells us, “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Considering sin is the general character for all of mankind, apart from Jesus, we can gather that she could not be without flaw. We also know that she was a woman, and from interpersonal and intrapersonal experience, we can speculate that she had some of the same emotions that we Christ-following women have today.
On the eve of Christ’s birth, I ponder: Was Mary scared? Was she anxious about being a mother or the pain that she would experience? Did she know her Son would die? Did she fear what the rest of her life would look like?
Christmas is a time when we surround ourselves with loved ones, so how does a mother cope when her child has died? These times marked for celebration can be harder for those walking through grief, as the gatherings magnify the loss. As the celebration of the birth of Jesus approaches, are you experiencing some of the emotions that Mary may have been experiencing—fear, anxiety, and uneasy questioning? Are you scared of the social gatherings? Are you anxious about the seasonal expectations? Are you grieving the absence of your child? Are you questioning how you will ever be able to celebrate anything again?
You have not been called to mother the King, but like Mary, you have been chosen. Chosen to follow God no matter your circumstance. Saying “yes” to God doesn’t mean that tribulations halt or that the pain ceases to exist, but it does mean that we can grieve with hope-filled purpose. As we stand with open arms in awe and wonder at the birth of the Redeemer that will bring us back to a right standing with God and give us eternity with Him, it is okay to also kneel at His feet and weep.
God has given us the presence of tears to cleanse the abundant pain that clings to those walking the path of grief. Tears are not your enemy, and their frequency or existence are not used to measure the lack or maturity of your faith. There is an array of Hebrew words used to denote the rains of different seasons. Geshem is one of them, and it refers to the heavy rains that occur during the fall and winter in Israel. This refers to the same season when we honor the birth of Jesus. Grief can be more paralyzing during this season because our arms are lacking who we so deeply want to hold during these celebratory times. Give yourself allowance to experience the geshem kind of cries.
“You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in Your bottle.”
Psalm 56:8
When land is dry and parched, it is difficult for the cultivator to tend and plow the fields to prepare it for fruitfulness. Then, the rains fall and submerse the land. The soil soaks up the moisture, drawing in all that the dampness has to offer. The result is that the cultivator can now easily plow through the land because the soil has been provided sufficient rain, and the land is prepared to produce an adequate crop. I love this picture. God can use our cleansing tears to prepare our dry hearts for the plowing He has ahead for our healing and the fruitfulness of our testimony.
It is possible you may feel like you will never enjoy the celebrations surrounding Christmas again, and they may never be the same as they were before. However, in time as you cling to God and His calling on your life, you may find a new meaning in the season. If you are desperate for God to penetrate your loneliness and suffering, that comfort can be found in the coming of God Himself in Christ to save us.
Not only does God allow us to mourn, He grieves with us (John 11:35), and He promises us that through His Son, one day there will be no more.
“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
Revelation 21:4
Today, let it rain. Tomorrow, Immanuel will reign. *
*Stay tuned for the post tomorrow about the reign of Immanuel, the coming King.
- Calli
Hope Mom to Blair
Calli Williams is a passionate Christ follower. Calli is married to Jared, and has six children: Gavyn, Grant, Bertie, Gwyneth, Blair, who has been in Glory since November 2014, and Brynne, who joined their family in November 2015. She enjoys spending time with her family, reading when she can steal a quiet moment, using her creativity to craft, and splurging on anything chocolate.
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