84 results for author: Constance Ray

Lies in Grief: I Should Have Prayed With More Faith

Welcome back to our Lies in Grief series. So far, we’ve covered lies about our bodies, our sin, and our blame when it comes to baby loss. This week we will expose lies about prayer and the strength of our faith in baby loss, and explore the comforting biblical truth of God’s greatness. ______ Lie: I should have prayed more, I should have had more faith, and my baby would be alive. Hope Mom, I have no doubt you have at some point begged “God, please save my baby.” Whether that request was uttered once under your breath when you knew the chances weren’t good, or prayed daily alongside others praying with you, the fact that your prayer ...

Lies in Grief: I Could Have Prevented My Baby’s Death

Welcome to Part 3 of our Lies in Grief series. So far, we’ve covered lies about our bodies and our sin when it comes to baby loss. This week we will expose lies about our power and control in baby loss, and explore the comforting biblical truth of God’s sovereignty. _____ Lie: I Could Have Prevented My Baby’s Death Hope Moms, Are you second-guessing every decision you made since the moment you learned you were with child? Are you wondering if there was something you did—or something you didn’t do—that was the cause of your baby’s death? As we try to figure out what happened and how everything went wrong—incessantly ...

Lies in Grief: God Took My Baby to Punish Me

Welcome to Part 2 of our Lies in Grief series. If you missed Part 1, you can read it HERE. Losing a baby makes us especially vulnerable to believing lies about ourselves and God. Having to unexpectedly say goodbye to our babies breaks our hearts, creating cracks that need filling. Unless we fill those cracks with God’s healing truth, the enemy is going to fill them with his lies. Join me in exposing these lies we are believing in grief, and let us experience the balm of His truth together.  _________ Lie: God took my baby to punish me This week, I’m addressing the lies that can take root when our awareness of our sinful nature ...

Lies in Grief: “My Body is Bad”

Friend, since becoming a Hope Mom, have the negative voices in your mind—and the ones around you—intensified? Losing a baby makes us especially vulnerable to believing lies about ourselves and God. Having to unexpectedly say goodbye to our babies breaks our hearts, creating cracks that need filling. Unless we fill those cracks with God’s healing truth, the enemy is going to fill them with his lies. This month I am going to be covering what God’s Word says to some of the common lies found in our community of Hope Moms. We were never meant to live life alone, and that is especially true in grief. I pray this month’s reflections help you ...

Mental Health Moment: Why Is It So Hard to Believe My Baby is Gone?

One of the hardest parts in the aftermath of losing a baby are constant reminders of them. Empty nurseries. Phantom kicks. A saved pregnancy test on the counter. Baby showers to cancel. Encroaching due dates. Exciting news that was never given a chance to be shared.  Bodies that remind us they were once creating life, but now are not. These reminders proclaim that there once was something to celebrate, but now they are not here, and they won’t be coming back. (Mama, if you need to pause with that last statement and cry your eyes out, go right ahead. Death is worth shedding tears over (John 11:35).) Our Hope Babies’ absence is not only ...

What hasn’t changed

Hi friend, Thanks for being here and walking through this conversation on identity with me over the last few weeks. We’ve talked about not recognizing ourselves anymore and about who we are now. And after everything we’ve walked through together, there’s still one question that rises in light of it all. If I’ve changed… and if I don’t fully recognize myself anymore… then what is still true? Because when so much feels uncertain, our hearts begin searching for something steady to stand on. _____________________________ What Hasn’t Changed After loss, it can feel like everything about you has shifted, such as the way ...

Who am I now?

Hi friend, Welcome to Part 2 of our Identity After Loss series. If you missed Part 1, you can read it here. There are questions that come after loss that you never expected to ask. They don’t always show up right away. Sometimes they hit you in a random moment, and other times they come all at once. But eventually, many of us find ourselves sitting with the same question. Who am I now? _____________________________ Who Am I Now? Before loss, I didn’t spend much time questioning my identity. I knew who I was. I knew what my life looked like. I had a sense of direction and confidence in where things were headed. I believed, ...

Today belongs to you, too.

Happy Mother’s Day. As I type these words, I feel the weight of what they hold for a Hope Mom. I wish I had the perfect words for you, something to say that could meet every ache and every question sitting in your heart. The truth is, I don’t, but I can sit here with you, and I can remind you that you are not alone in any of this. I am praying that you feel carried by the grace God has for you today. He will meet you in each moment as it comes. You don’t have to have what you need for the whole day all at once. He will give it to you as you go. His grace is sufficient for you. I’m praying that you feel cared for in tangible ways. That ...

When you don’t recognize yourself anymore

For most of us, there is a moment after loss when we realize something we didn’t expect. In our grief, we begin to see that we’re not just grieving our babies, but the million little losses that come with it, too. One of the biggest is noticing that we don’t quite feel like ourselves anymore. I’m sharing this as part of a short three-part series on identity after loss, because this piece of the grief journey can feel especially disorienting and hard to put into words. If you’ve felt this too, I hope you know you’re not alone.  Before I walked through loss, I thought grief was mostly sadness over what was gone. I assumed it ...

What does it mean to be ‘in Heaven’?

Our Easter service a few weeks ago included the song Death Was Arrested; the song’s bridge reads: Oh we’re free free forever we’re free Come join the song of all the redeemed Yes we’re free free forever amen When death was arrested and my life began As the song played, I immediately thought of my Hope Baby, William–he could have sung these words with me that very moment and meant every one of them! He is free, redeemed, and his life began the moment he woke up in Heaven.  Did you know the same is true for you and your Hope Babies? They are worshipping constantly; this means that whenever you worship, you and your babies are ...