Andrea’s Story

2019 was our family’s hardest year. But, looking back, I can see God’s hand at work and His love through it all. We are missionaries in Zambia, Africa, where we serve young people at a mission school. In March, after I came home from helping at a family fun day at the school, I lay down to rest and suddenly was hit with a strange, uncomfortable pain in my right side. I was 12 weeks pregnant and had not had a scan, so I thought something must be wrong with the pregnancy.

We took off in the pouring rain toward a town called Kitwe. The 50 minute drive seemed a lot longer than normal. The pain was constant, and there was little relief. I felt every pothole. We prayed for healing and God’s protection as we sped along the road. On the way, we communicated with our new missionary friends in Kitwe, who had just told us about their friend who was a highly recommended OB doctor. We could see how the Lord had prepared the way for us.   

Our friends called the doctor and informed him about what was going on. I braced for the worst, as we went to have an ultrasound. Everything look normal, but I was admitted for the night because of the extreme pain. When morning came, I tried to get up and walk, but I could tell that something was not right. I felt as if a truck had run over my lower abdomen. 

After the morning evaluation, the doctor informed us that he suspected it was appendicitis. The surgeon came in shortly after and confirmed that the pain was coming from my appendix. They let us know that surgery was urgently needed to save the baby and to keep the infection from spreading. This was not what we had hoped to hear, but God was in control. I believed that God had brought us here, and my life was in His hands. 

Although the surgeon tried to reassure us that he had done many of these surgeries, I was very anxious. We prayed for God’s presence and peace, and I felt a calm and peace as the nurse wheeled me off to surgery. I prayed for protection and asked for peace. Before going under, I remember thinking how calm I felt. God was there with me and I was in His hands (Psalm 28:7).

 I woke up, so thankful to have made it through surgery. In the recovery room, I tried to make sense of everything. We gave thanks to God for a successful surgery and prayed that our baby would also be fine. I was told that if nothing went wrong in the first 24 hours after surgery the pregnancy should be fine. 

I spent the next three days in the hospital on IV antibiotics. Our new friends and their church family brought food for Aaron to eat. They where such a blessing! Strangers took time to cook for us and visit. What a beautiful picture of the church that was for us, brothers and sisters in Christ caring for their fellow believers, even though we were strangers to them. We later found out that people all over the world had started praying for us and that we had been the “missionaries of the week” at our home church in Texas. That specific week of the surgery, God had orchestrated for our church to be praying for us.

Before I was discharged, we had an ultrasound to check on our baby. Everything looked fine. What relief! As I spent the next days resting and slowly regaining strength, I couldn’t be more thankful to God for watching over me and the baby, and that I was back home. Our church friends brought us meals and helped watch our two girls so that I could recover. 

I went back after a week for another evaluation. Everything was healing and our baby looked healthy and fine. I was cleared for our flight to the US for our home assignment which had been scheduled for three weeks after the surgery. 

As I reflected on all that had happened, I was comforted that God held me in His palm. He had brought me to the right doctors for a quick diagnoses and successful surgery. He had prepared the way in the midst of this hardship, and although I hadn’t had the “healthy” pregnancy I had hoped for, I felt at peace. Christ was with me in the midst of this storm we had just been through (Deuteronomy 31:8).  

During the following days as I had my quiet time, I was reading in Mark 14 and journaling about when Jesus prayed before His death for God to take His cup from Him. I pondered on His words, “Yet, not my will, but what you will” (vv 36). How often had I prayed for what I wanted, instead of asking that God’s will be done?

I realized that I should be seeking His will instead of only “demanding” specific requests. Reading on through when Peter ran and followed Jesus from a distance after Jesus was arrested, I asked myself, “Am I willing to walk with Jesus when it gets tough? Or would I follow at a distance like Peter did when faced with a hard time?” 

I had been praying for a healthy pregnancy, but, instead, God allowed me to endure appendicitis, and I may not ever know the reason (Isaiah 55:8-9). Little did I know that life was about to get harder, and I was about walk through the hardest time of my life. 

The weeks leading up to our flight, I could not seem to shake my fatigue. I had started to experience some mild back cramping but didn’t think much of it as I was recovering from surgery. The day we drove to the airport, I did not feel 100% and figured it was related to my recovery, having to pack, and being pregnant. 

While waiting in Addis, Ethiopia for our connecting flight, I started feeling worse. My whole body ached. I could barely sit from the pain, and I just wanted to lie down. I made it on the plane and sat down, exhausted. Shortly after takeoff, I knew something was terribly wrong. We still had six hours of flight time remaining. I had no idea what to do. I  prayed throughout the the flight as I tried to doze and remain calm.  I kept praying that if we were going to lose this baby that God would allow it to wait until we landed in Frankfurt.

What was I going to do if it started getting worse thousands of feet in the sky somewhere over North Africa? I pushed these thoughts out of my mind and strangely enough felt some calm. I even managed to doze a little, even though at times the pain was unbearable. 

After landing, I felt just awful and wanted to sleep, but when I started losing amniotic fluid, I knew we were going to lose our baby. Still, God had my life and our baby’s in His hands, and He had a plan. 

Medics arrived, and I was taken to the University Hospital of Frankfurt. I felt so cold and couldn’t stop shivering. I was covered in blankets, yet still freezing cold. I was quickly taken into an examine room for an ultrasound. Everything was done quickly as I was losing a lot of blood. If the worst of it would have started seven hours earlier while flying, I may not be here today due to the amount of blood loss. We saw yet again how God had a plan, and we knew He was in control.

The doctor explained that I needed surgery immediately. I had an oxygen mask pressed against my face and everything went black as I begged God for a miracle and begged to see Aaron and my girls again. 

I woke up and felt like I was living in a nightmare. My baby was no longer with me. I tried to pray, but didn’t know what to say. The doctor came in and told me that the surgery went well, but we had lost our baby. I felt as if I was in a dream. This hadn’t happened—couldn’t be happening—and yet, it was my reality. 

Aaron had been stranded at the airport with our luggage and two upset girls wanting their mama. After he finally found out which hospital I had been taken to, he managed to get a taxi to find me. I was so relieved to see them walk through the door. My aunt drove two hours to be with us and help with the girls too.

We cried out to God and prayed as we shed tears of grief and pain. He had given us a baby boy and had taken him right back. At 16 weeks, our baby had perfectly formed toes and fingers. He was fearfully and wonderfully made. We don’t know why, and we may never know on this side of heaven, but God had a purpose for it all. Our baby had a purpose. God knew all the days he would live and that he would be born right into Jesus’ arms (Psalm 139:16).

“The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.” Job 1:21

Our hearts where shattered and I felt numb. We decided that Aaron should go back with our girls and my aunt to settle down for the night as I had to stay overnight. I tried to sleep, but couldn’t. While I didn’t know what to pray, this song came to mind over and over:

“When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say
It is well, it is well, with my soul

It is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul”

All I could do was cling to Jesus. I can’t tell you how thankful I am to know these hymns, especially this one. If you know the history of it, you will know that it was written by Spatford after he tragically lost all of his children. There is so much meaning in those words. 

Many friends sent me verses that I read over and over that night. They took on a whole new meaning in the midst of my grief.  

“Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned;
The flames will not set you ablaze.
For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior.”
Isaiah 43:1-3

Although I was discharged the next day, I ended up back in the hospital the same night with a high fever. For a whole week I was in the hospital to treat infection. It felt as though the trials would never end. 

I wrestled with many questions and thoughts during those days. If we had been in the US for the appendicitis, would we still have our baby? So many questions and doubts crept in about being on the mission field. I prayed and read Scripture, and I know many prayed for us during this time.

I came to clearly understand that believers are not exempt from hard times. The question is not if trials will come, but if I will continue to hold on to truth and trust God when they come. No-one will have a trial-free life on this side of heaven, but one day He will swallow up death forever (Isaiah 25:8). The only guarantee in life is Christ and His unending love (Lamentations 3:22-23). Would I follow Christ at a distance, or stay as close to Him as possible? All I could do was cling to Christ. 

“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”
1 Peter 1:6-7

2019 was the hardest year of my life. Questions still pop up and waves of grief still come our way, but through it all our family has grown closer to each other and to our Lord. I have learned so much about God and His love for me. No matter what comes your way, remember, He is faithful. He will give you strength when you feel weak, He will comfort you when your heart is shattered and bruised, and His love is forever. 

We look forward to a new year and put our trust and hope in Christ as He leads us. He has given us blessing number 4, and we anxiously await the arrival of our sweet baby this spring. It has not been an easy pregnancy, and doubt threatens to creep in, but we cling to the knowledge that Christ is in control and that He loves us

 My husband, Aaron, and I live in sub-Sahara Africa where we serve as full-time missionaries at a mission boarding school. We spend most of our days teaching and doing life with our students while focusing on sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with them. I am mom to Olivia (6), Heidi (4), a baby boy (Silas) who was born into the arms of Jesus (2019) and a little girl due in the spring of 2020. I love spending quality time with my family. I’m a big fan of all types of sports and love to jump into a pick-up game. Being creative through photography and art when I have time are some of my favorites. I love when I can be active and creative with my girls. One of my favorite verses is Lamentations 3:21-23.

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