The Gift of Zachary

As we consider the profound impact that our Hope Babies have had on our lives, we can be filled with gratitude toward them, and toward the Lord. In this series, we reflect on some of the ways that we can say “thank you” to our precious babe(s) for the gifts that they have been and continue to be to us. We welcome you to contribute to this series by writing your own reflection on the impact your baby(ies) has had on your life and submitting it HERE.

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I’ve read through the description for this topic a few times and contemplated what ways I am grateful for my son—who I only got to hold briefly when he was stillborn. I didn’t get to see his smile or hear him coo, so it takes a little pondering to get the jumbled thoughts in my head to fall into some sort of order so I can write them down as words. Here is my feeble attempt. 

I have three, grown, living children, and I can quickly rattle off ways I am thankful for them. But how can I be thankful for a child so many in the world would say I never knew? The truth is, I do know him, and he changed my life. 

I am thankful Zach taught me what hope is. True hope. The hope of eternal life we have through Jesus Christ. Every day, every minute, I am reminded of the gift of knowing I will spend eternity with my son. I am not without hope. I am full of hope. 

I have this Hope as an anchor for my soul. Hebrews 6:19

I am thankful Zach’s life and loss taught me that no matter what, the Lord is with me, and He is faithful. The Lord isn’t faithful only when things go our way. He is faithful to carry us when things go very badly. He is there to comfort us and restore our joy and peace. 

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him… Romans 15:13

I am thankful Zach reminded me what is important in this life. It isn’t the things, it’s the people. We never know how long we will have them in our lives so we need to cherish our loved ones every single day. Unfortunately, I learned at an early age there are no guarantees. It doesn’t make me fearful. It makes me determined to make the most of the time I have with those I love. 

Since no one knows the future, who can tell someone else what is to come? As no one has power over the wind to contain it, no one has power over the time of their death. Ecclesiastes 8:7-8 (NIV)

I am thankful Zach taught me the importance of sharing our pain with others. I tried for a long time to keep the pain of the loss to myself until I learned others could be encouraged by my story. Sharing my loss opened the door for me to share the hope of Christ with others. It gave me the opportunity to help others walk through their grief. It wasn’t always easy and was often messy, but helping another hurting soul, helped me. 

He comforts us so we can comfort others. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (paraphrased)

Without Zach’s life, I may have bumbled through life without noticing the hurting around me. Zach taught me what grief looked like. So, I’m thankful Zach taught me how to grieve and how to grieve well. 

I am thankful Zach taught me I am strong. I know I can withstand heartache of unthinkable magnitude. I have strength only the Lord can give, and Zach’s death taught me how to really tap into God’s strength. Only in His strength can I be strong. 

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you,
for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

Standing in the middle of a cemetery, looking at a casket mimicking a bassinet on a cold December day, made me incredibly weak. My soul was weak. My heart, brain, and body were weak. In my weakness, I knew Jesus was the only source of my strength, and I needed to reach out to Him. Like a loving, tender Father, He lifted me up and became my strength. When I didn’t have answers, He did. When I was full of sorrow, He gave me joy. When I was angry, He washed over me with love. 

I am thankful Zach made me weak. In my weakness, I found my true strength. The strength of the Lord. He is my All in All. 

After our son died, my husband adopted a new lullaby to sing over our children. It was our declaration and conviction. 

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all…
Jesus, Lamb of God, worthy is Your name 
~ Dennis Jernigan

Yes, I am thankful for my son! So very thankful!

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Shelly D. Templin is an author, speaker and blogger that shares a message of hope—with humor. She has three daughters, a son-in-law, and a granddaughter. Shelly lives in Texas with her husband, Jack, of 29 years and their two dogs.

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