Strength in the Sorrow: Psalm 16

God’s Word is sufficient for our every need, even those that follow the heartbreaking loss of a child. In this series, Hope Moms share about the way God, through His life-giving Word, has provided them with the strength, comfort, encouragement, and hope they needed as they walk through the valleys of loss and grief.
“My soul melts away for sorrow; strengthen me according to Your word!” Psalm 119:28

Following the death my babies, everything in my life felt like it had been shaken. I constantly needed to remind my weary soul that my foundation—Jesus Christ—was secure. I clung to the life-giving Word of God day after day because nothing else could bring true and lasting comfort to the pain that had forced its way so deep into my heart. In those earliest days of my grief, God continued to bring me back to Psalm 16. The more I read this chapter, the more I found myself able to anchor myself to the hope of Christ.

“Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.”
Psalm 16:1

When I found out that my baby’s heart was no longer beating, I instantly felt like everyone who saw me could tell that I was carrying his lifeless body inside of me—like they knew that I was the mother whose body had failed her baby. All I wanted to do was hide. I wanted to find a safe place where I could wrestle with the brokenness inside of me and let the tears fall freely. When I was overwhelmed with the flood of emotions that continually flooded my heart, God was my refuge. Nothing else could comfort and sustain me as His loving arms did and still do.

“I say to the Lord, ‘You are my Lord;
I have no good apart from You.’
As for the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones,
in whom is all my delight.
The sorrows of those who run after another god shall multiply;
their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out
or take their names on my lips.
The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup;
You hold my lot.”
Psalm 16:2-5

Each time I heard that the child I was carrying inside me had gone, it felt as though the “good” in my life had left with them. But that simply wasn’t so. My satisfaction could not be found in having all of my children on earth with me, but in Christ alone. He needed to be my portion. Anything else I chase after or desire on this earth, even having my babies in my arms once more, will always pale in comparison to the hope and joy that is found in the Lord. There can be no good thing apart from Him. Even in grief, He is enough.

“The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance.”
Psalm 16:6

There were certainly times early on in my grief when it was difficult to recognize these “pleasant places.” How could anything seem pleasant when I have two precious babies gone from me? When my heart was burdened with the weight of sorrow, I needed to learn how to refocus the ever present ache unto the eternal hope of Christ. I needed to train my eyes to look heavenward. These ashes of sorrow were not my inheritance. No, in Christ, I have been given an inheritance with God, Himself—the same inheritance that my babies have also been given and are enjoying with the Lord even now.

“I bless the Lord who gives me counsel;
in the night also my heart instructs me.”
Psalm 16:7

When fear and doubt crept in, He counseled me through His Word towards greater trust in His sovereign care for me. When the sorrow seemed too great to bear, I knew that as I opened up my pain and tears to Him, He would always hear me and lead me into places of deeper peace and comfort. His Spirit at work in my heart sustained me through those darkest of days. As I trained my ears to hear His counsel, I was being equipped to fight the lies of discouragement and hopelessness that raged against me.

“I have set the Lord always before me;
because He is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.”
Psalm 16:8

Oh! What a comfort this verse was to me. With Christ beside me, though the burden of sorrow was heavy indeed, it would not overtake me. When the storms of grief threatened to knock me down, I could remain confident that I would not be shaken, because I knew that my foundation was secure. But this setting of the Lord before me was a choice I had to make every single day. It’s a choice I still have to make daily. When faced with the decision to dwell in despair or dwell with the the Lord, I must choose Him over and over again, for I cannot stand apart from Him.

“Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;
my flesh also dwells secure.
For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol,
or let Your holy one see corruption.
You make known to me the path of life;
in Your presence there is fullness of joy;”
Psalm 16:9-11

The death of our beloved children is certainly not a thing in which we rejoice. But even in my grief, there was still a place in which I could rejoice. My joy and my security were not merely as deep as my circumstances. No. Because the Lord is my refuge, my chosen portion, and my beautiful inheritance, there is fullness of joy. I grieve, but I carry on in hope because death has already been defeated. My soul has not been abandoned. My babies have not been abandoned. Jesus made certain of that when He gave up His life for me, and for them, on the cross. True, lasting joy is possible because of the nail-pierced hands of our merciful Savior.

This joy is possible for you too, sweet sister.

As you learn to place your hope in Christ—when He becomes your chosen portion—you will find refuge and stability. Nothing else satisfies, nothing else can sustain you as He does. Let Him be your portion, your treasure, your greatest good, trusting that He will uphold you through the sorrows and difficulties of life.

How have you found strength in God’s Word in the midst of your sorrow? We’d love to have you share with us HERE