Selah: 2021 Virtual Retreat Experience
Registration for our retreat has been open for a few weeks now, and I am humbled to see so many of you already signing up to join us for this two-day event. This year many of our chapters have partnered with us to offer in person locations too—this means that you have the option to 1) join us from the comfort of your own home (online and virtually) or 2) to attend in person at one of our 10 different locations.
(To see if there is a chapter hosting an event near you click here.)
While I wish we could all be together at Camp Tejas like we usually are, I am still so excited to share in this weekend with you. Last fall’s virtual retreat was wonderful in many ways, and we are grateful for all the women who bravely showed up to seek Jesus in their suffering with us. At the end of our time together, we asked for their feedback, and the main request was for us to allow more time for connection with each other. That is what we missed most of all too! So, this year we are adding small group times. You will get to meet in a small group of about seven women, and you will get to share your story and listen to theirs as we hold a space for the grief, together.
This year’s retreat experience will be a mix of live and pre-recorded sessions. Together we will worship, be encouraged, lament, and really press into what the Lord has for us in our suffering while discovering what it means to rest—to Selah.
Have you heard this word before? Chances are you’ve read it in the Bible, or maybe you’ve heard of the band by the same name. Whether this word is common in your vernacular or brand new to you, I want you to take a moment and soak in the realities of this God-breathed word.
The Hebrew word Selah is found in Scripture 74 times, and 71 of those are found in the book of Psalms. Many commentaries I’ve read say that Selah is a mysterious, ambiguous word. However, I’ve also read commentaries that say King David used this word in the Psalms as a place to take a breath, settle into what was just said, rest, and remember. Of the commentaries that lean in this direction, there are three primary meanings of this word that most scholars can agree on.
One of the meanings of Selah is commonly used as a musical term. Selah is the resting time—the downtime when the song takes a turn and all the chaos of the previous sound is silent, giving room for the audience to reflect and for the musicians to rest before the song takes on a different direction. Songs need pauses, dynamics, and moments of reflection, for without them they would just be never-ending noise. If we think of our lives in terms of a song, Selah is one of the ways we can walk in tune with the Spirit. It is the easy yoke that Jesus invites us to put on as God walks alongside us, bearing the weight of this grief for us. What beautiful harmony!
“Come to me, all you who are weary
and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am gentle and humble in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)
Many scholars also believe that one of the root words of Selah is a word used in terms of measurement. So, when we Selah, we stop and measure our lives. Selah used in this way requires us to sit with the Lord and to call to mind the pain and difficulties of this season so we can adjust accordingly as we look forward in hope to our future. Along with remembering the hard things and crying out to God, remembering the goodness and mercies of God can very much enrich your present by allowing you to see all the ways His provision has surrounded you in your darkest hour, making way for you to acknowledge and praise Him for all He’s done. His hand is not against you or your sweet baby. His compassion extends to both (and all).
“The Lord is good to all; He has compassion on all He has made.
All your works praise you, Lord; your faithful people extol you.
They tell of the glory of your kingdom and speak of your might,
so that all people may know of your mighty acts
and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.
Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom,
and your dominion endures through all generations.”
Psalm 145: 9-13 (NIV)
Selah can also give our grieving lives structure, and structure causes things to grow and thrive. Did you know that a grapevine seeks out and grows toward structure? It is what they were created to do. A grapevine understands that it cannot flourish and support itself without a structure, and our God has created us similarly. Jesus says,
“If you remain in me and my words remain in you,
ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.
This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit,
showing yourselves to be my disciples.
“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you.
Now remain in my love.
If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love,
just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in His love.
I have told you this so that my joy may be in you
and that your joy may be complete.”
John 15: 7-11 (NIV)
We, like the grapevine, can only remain in Christ when we give ourselves time to rest, reflect, and allow Him to be the firm foundation we were created to build our lives upon. Selah gives us the framework to do this, for without it we can miss out on the fullness of what God is doing in, around, and through us.
Sweet sister, I know you have loved with a whole heart, and I know that heart is now broken. You may be questioning God’s goodness, His nearness, and His sovereignty. Life finds a way of returning after loss, and that can be really hard. But because our God is infinitely complex—you, precious Hope Mom, have His likeness, which means you are able to hold both joy and sorrow, hope and despair, life and death, love and loss, All at the same time. Getting over the sadness isn’t the goal, having a heart like Christ is. That is what heals us. God is growing something in you, even if you can’t see it. You just have to hold on and Selah.
If you would like to join us for this weekend of pressing into the Lord together, sign up today! You can register here. And while you await our weekend together, you can practice pausing and reflecting now with this SELAH exercise below:
S – Stop your chaotic world for a moment.
E – Exhale. Take a deep breath. Inhale the love of God, exhale love to God.
L – Look. How has your loss affected you—the pain and also the joy? What do you need to be prepared for? What does God have next for you? Look for ways God has been with you. Look ahead to what’s coming.
A – Ask Him for whatever you need to, nothing is off limits. What are you wondering about your baby’s death? About your life? About God? What is holding you back? What is keeping you stuck?
H – Hear God out. Let Him minister to your heart. Practice praying and then listening. Listen to worship music. Read His Word. Sit in silence with Him.
Registration for our 2021 Virtual Retreat Experience is now open and we want to invite you in to spend two days with us as we Selah together. You don’t have to be ashamed to come broken, angry, hurting, questioning, nervous, or healing—we want you as you are. We want to hear your story—and not the summed up or detached version we Hope Moms so often share with others—but rather the long and heartfelt story of your baby and your grief, because you are safe to be your baby’s mom with us. In fact, that’s what we want most for you! We want to provide you with space away from your everyday life where you can just be your baby’s mom and breathe. It is our great prayer that you would find rest, connect with the Lord, make friends, and be anchored to the compassion and healing that Christ offers to those who suffer. You are loved!
Learn more and register for our 2021 Virtual Retreat Experience HERE.
- Jennie
Hope Mom to Paige Marie
Jennie is the Executive Director for Hope Mommies. She and her husband Brian live in Washington State and have four precious children together— Trenton who is 14, Paige who has been in Heaven with Jesus since August 2, 2010, Mason who is 9, and Cora Jane who is 2. If you were to knock on her front door today, you’d find her in jeans and a t-shirt drinking a hot cup of tea (and she’d offer you one too!) while trying to figure out how to balance all the things – like spending time in God’s word, tending to her home, pruning her roses, serving with Hope Mommies, and online schooling with her kids! She adores being a new creation in Christ and prays she reflects Him well on this earth.
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