Remember His Faithfulness
Paul reminds us in his letter to the church in Thessalonica that we do “not grieve as others do who have no hope” (1 Thess. 4:13). But what exactly does that mean? In this series, we explore what it looks like to honor God in our grief and examine the ways we can choose to grieve with hope.
“Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live.”
Deuteronomy 4:9 (NIV)
Can you think of an experience in your past you just knew would be seared in your mind, frame by frame, for the rest of your life? Perhaps it was your wedding day, the birth of your first child, or the loss of your hope baby. In the moment, you see everything so crisply and you can’t help but replay it over and over in your mind. But inevitably, over time, the memories begin to lose their color and blur a little around the edges. It’s hard to believe that something that seemed so vivid in the moment could ever slip out of focus, but surely enough it does.
As humans, we are forgetful creatures. We become so consumed by our present and preoccupied with our future that our past can slowly drift from our consciousness. Of course, the Lord knows that we are prone to forget, even the big things. Of all the commands in the Bible, the command to remember, or to not forget, is one of the most repeated. This verse in Deuteronomy 4 was directed to the Israelites just before they were to enter the Promised Land.
These are the people who had witnessed incredible signs and plagues from God’s hands before being delivered from bondage in Egypt, and who had crossed through a sea on dry land before watching their enemies swallowed by the waves. These were same people who followed the presence of God as a cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night, and who ate bread that fell from the sky each morning in the wilderness. They had seen miracle after miracle, assurance after assurance, of God’s faithfulness and provision. And yet, here they are being commanded not to forget. As Thomas Spurgeon writes in his commentary on this verse, “To them, I suppose, it seemed impossible, certainly improbable, that they would forget the things that their eyes had seen.”
But God knows His people.
So over and over again, He commands them to remember. And in His gracious kindness, He provides His people tangible ways to remember. He gives them the ritual of Passover to remember their deliverance from Egypt. He gives them the Ark of The Covenant, filled with the Ten Commandments, manna, and Aaron’s staff to remember God’s provision during their years in the desert. After entering the Promised Land, when God’s people again crossed a major waterway on dry land, Joshua set up 12 stones of remembrance (Joshua 4:3, 6, 7). And in 1 Samuel 7:12, after defeating the Philistines, the prophet Samuel set up a stone he called Ebenezer, to commemorate God’s help.
We, like the Israelites, need rituals and physical reminders of God’s past faithfulness towards us. We need to surround ourselves with “stones of remembrance” or “Ebenezers” to trigger our memories of the myriad ways the Lord has carried and delivered us.
I love how God describes Himself to Moses in Exodus 34:6: “The Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.” Sister, how do you cultivate remembrance of His faithfulness, His compassion, and graciousness in your life?
Looking back at my 30 years, I have done this several ways:
Writing
Through the years, I’ve filled many a journal with my prayers and conversations with God. Often times those prayers are filled with pleas and cries of anguish, but as I look back I can see the ways the Lord has answered and fulfilled prayers over and over—frequently in ways I could never have imagined. Consider the book of Psalms. David and the other psalmists simply couldn’t contain their heartbreak, struggles, and anxieties, and so they poured their hearts out before God. But they also couldn’t contain their marvel at His wonders, His works, and His unending mercy toward them. If you don’t already, I highly encourage you to spend a little time journaling, especially if you are new to this grief journey.
Speak
Tell your story. Repeat over and over again the ways God has proved Himself faithful in your life. Psalm 66:16 says, “Come and hear, all you who fear God; let me tell you what He has done for me.” I have found that losing Max, and seeing the incredible ways God has pursued my heart in the absence of my son, has made it nearly impossible for me to keep quiet. I cannot help but speak of God’s faithfulness and mercies.
Physical Reminders
When I worked at a Christian camp in college, we were encourage to write a word on a rock that would serve as our Ebenezer or reminder of the ways we saw God move during that summer. While I don’t have any rocks laying around my house these days, I have several physical reminders of God’s faithfulness since losing Max. One of my favorites is a canvas print of the balloon release we held at Max’s Celebration of Life. While I don’t discount the depth of pain we felt in those early days, this photo brings me great joy. To see the community who surrounded us and loved us and our boy so well is a sweet reminder of God’s goodness. To a stranger in my home, it’s just a photo of some people and balloons. But for me, it’s a daily trigger to thank God for walking so closely and intimately with us.
The other is a large Bible verse that some friends sent me shortly after we lost Max. It hangs on the wall above my headboard, where I can see it every single night before I get in bed. It’s a verse from Isaiah 46:4 that reads, “I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.”
We are commanded over and over again to remember God’s faithfulness, His provision, and His deliverance. While this honors the Lord and brings Him glory, and while it can point others toward Him as well, I am convinced that He wants us to remember for our own benefit. When we remember His past faithfulness, we can have hope and assurance of His faithfulness yet to come. As the author of Lamentations says, “Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:21-24).
Sister, whatever today looks like, whatever struggles you find yourself facing, remember God’s faithfulness that led you here. Take some time and meditate on His goodness, His mercies, the specific ways He has shown Himself in your life and in your loss. And let that faithfulness define and determine your future.
- Sam
Hope Mom to Max and Baby Martin
Sam is a graphic designer and marketing professional in Frisco, Texas. She and her husband, Spencer, have been married since 2011, and have two children in heaven, Max & Baby Martin, and one in their arms, Lachlan. They enjoy serving in their church, building community, and restoring their 100 year-old home. Sam is in two book clubs and can always be found with a book in her purse and a warm beverage in her hand.
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