Q: Can I Pray to My Baby?
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So often when we have a loved one die, it is very common to hear words like, “I know they are looking down and watching over us.” While this may seem comforting, is it accurate? Are our babies in heaven watching over us? Do they see us? Can we pray to them?
Can I Pray to My Baby in Heaven?
In Philippians 1:23 Paul says that his “desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better.”
When our babies die, they go to be with Jesus in heaven. The Bible says that in heaven, Jesus “will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” (Revelation 21:4) Our babies aren’t sad or lonely. They don’t miss us, because they are in the presence of Jesus. They don’t need to be concerned with what is happening in our lives here on earth, because they are with Jesus and they are happy. Our loving God is providing everything they need—they lack for no good thing.
In the Ten Commandments, we learn that we are not to have any gods before the one, true God. Exodus 34:14 says, “For you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.” So if our Heavenly Father is the only god we should worship, then it would follow that we ought only pray to the one true God.
In 1 Timothy 2:5, Paul tells us, “For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.” Jesus is the only mediator between God and men. Our babies cannot fill this role. They were not meant to nor given the authority to communicate to God on our behalf. We are not to pray to people or to angels, but only to God, through Christ Jesus. Rather than idolizing our babies by trying to pray to them (which we have been commanded not to do) or for them (of which they have no need, because they are being perfectly cared for by Christ in His glorious presence) we must focus our hearts on Christ and the throne of grace that He has opened to us.
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”
Hebrews 4:15-16
Prayer must be reserved for our conversations with God.
Can I Talk to My Baby in Heaven?
God invites us to come to Him with what’s on our hearts. Undoubtedly, your precious baby is on your heart all the time, and God understands your longing to feel connected to baby, and for your baby to know of your love for him or her. While it may be possible that our babies in heaven are aware of what is happening here on earth, we simply cannot know this for sure, or to what extent. What we do know is that God hears us, and we can trust God to do what He knows is best.
The good news is that the Lord loves for us to talk to Him—to share our fears, hurts, and struggles with Him. Don’t be afraid to tell God of the deep love you have for your baby and the ache that has filled your heart because you miss them. He is waiting to comfort us in our times of grief. He actually catches our tears in a bottle according to Psalms 56:8, “You have kept count of my tossings (wanderings or sorrows); put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your book?”
We must ultimately trust that God knows what is best for us and for our babies. Perhaps He has let our babies know of our love for them. Perhaps they already know. But, dear momma, find comfort in the truth that our babies have been completely saturated in the perfect, never-ending, far-reaching love of God. They could not possibly experience greater love than they already have been given in Christ.
I know we long to talk to our babies. I get that. This separation from them is so hard. But when we think of them in heaven, with Jesus and all of the relatives who have gone there before us, we can take comfort in knowing our babies are just fine. They are happy and whole. I love to think of my grandparents walking in heaven with my son. I love the idea that perhaps my grandmothers were waiting for my son to arrive and fought over who would hold him first.
A story I read after my son died helped me understand that the separation that happens when someone dies, and that my baby was okay. It is called “Waterbugs and Dragonflies: Explaining Death to Young Children” by Doris Stickney. This story tells the tale of a water bug that undergoes the transformation of becoming a dragonfly. While he had to leave his home in the water with the rest of the water bug colony, once transformed above the service of the water, the dragonfly was whole and happy in his wonderful new home.
The water bugs that remained below the surface wondered why every once in awhile one of their colony would leave their home in the pond. But until it was their time to undergo the transformation themselves, they would not be able to truly understand the changes that had taken place in the ones that had gone before them.
Our babies are also whole and happy in their wonderful new home. There is nowhere better for them to be than in the presence of God. And on this side of eternity, you and I will not be able to fully understand the glories of heaven that our babies are experiencing right now.
Dear Mama, I encourage you to rest in knowing your baby is with Jesus. Talk to the Lord about your sorrow and struggles. He longs to offer you His joy and peace.
“I waited patiently for the Lord; He inclined to me and heard my cry.”
Psalms 40:1
“Casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.”
1 Peter 5:7
- Shelly
Hope Mom to Zachary Robert
Shelly D. Templin is an author, speaker and blogger that shares a message of hope – with humor. She has three daughters, a son-in- law, and a granddaughter. Shelly lives in Texas with her husband, Jack, of 29 years and their two dogs.
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