A Song for My Soul: Remember
Music has the ability to speak into the deepest recesses of our hearts. God often uses songs to speak hope and encouragement to our souls. In this series, Hope Moms share songs that have pointed them to the hope of Christ in the midst of their grief. Is there a song that has comforted you in your grief? We’d love to have you share your story here.
“Oh Lord, thank You for making me empty so that You can fill me with more of You. I never thought I would or could thank You for this emptiness, but I can feel you filling me up right now, and I know You have only begun! Please use me and use this story you have crafted, Lord. I want to use it to glorify You, Lord, I’m just not sure how yet…”
These are the words that I scribbled in my prayer journal this past fall. It has now been a little over six months since our Paige Abigail went home to Jesus. We miss her every single day. Some days, my journal is filled with entries like the one above, and many other days it is filled with tear-stained pages of pleas for strength and peace. My emotions change almost daily, but one thing that I have found that never wavers is my hope in the Lord and the promises He has given us. This has truly been my anchor. I have never understood the verse from Hebrews quite as well and as intimately as I do now.
“We who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to hold fast to the hope set before us. We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain.”
Hebrews 6:18b-19
One of my go-to life songs right now is “Remember” by Lauren Daigle:
“In the darkest hour, when I cannot breath,
Fear is on my chest, the weight of the world on me,
Everything is crashing down, everything I have known,
When I wonder if I’m all alone
I remember, I remember
You have always been faithful to me
I remember, I remember
Even when my own eyes could not see
You were there, always there with me.
I will lift my eyes, even in the pain,
Above all the lies, I know you can make a way.
I have seen giants fall,
I have seen mountains move,
I have seen waters part because of You.
I can’t stop thinking about Your goodness.”
Even though I prayed that God would move mountains and make a way to heal Paige while her heart was still beating here on earth, that’s not how He decided to show His faithfulness to me in this season. Instead, He showed His faithfulness through His peace and presence in the room when we learned that Paige had gone home to the arms of Jesus. He showed His faithfulness when He gave me the strength to just get out of bed and “do the day” in the very beginning after saying goodbye to our little girl. I saw His faithfulness when He led me straight into the arms of a group of women called Hope Mommies who are walking the same walk that I am.
His faithfulness has been so evident in the countless warriors who have covered us in prayer— family and friends who have caught so many of my tears in their very own hands. And one of the clearest ways that I see His faithfulness daily is through the man that He chose to be Paige’s dad—a husband who has never once complained about tear-soaked shoulders and who has been the voice that whispers, “We will get through this together.” more times than I can even count. This loving Father of ours continues to show His faithfulness every single day, and I choose to continue hoping in Him and His promises.
On the days when I woke up wishing it was all just a bad dream, the days where the tears would not stop and the ache seemed unbearable, I began looking—clinging really—to the hope that I have in God. Hope in the promise that He is working all of this pain and heartache for His good.
“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
Romans 8:28
Hope in the promise that the pain of this broken world won’t even compare to the glory that our Lord is going to reveal to us when we are reunited with Him and with the pieces of our heart that have already gone home to Him.
“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God.”
Romans 8:18-19
Hope in the promise that God is good and I can trust in His words. In every loving decision that He makes for me, He will hold me up on the days when I can’t stand on my own, and He will provide in His perfect timing.
“The Lord is faithful in all His word and kind in all His works.
The Lord upholds all who are falling and raises up all who are bowed down.
The eyes of all look to You, and You give them their food in due season.”
Psalm 145:13-15
Hope in the promise that He knows what is best for me and that He will shower me with strength that only He can provide.
“He does not faint or grow weary; His understanding is unsearchable.
He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might He increases strength.”
Isaiah 40:28-29
A hope in the promise that the holy Spirit abides within me and will cover me with joy and peace during trials such as these.
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,
so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.
Romans 15:13
Even on the days where I have not quite been able to find the joy, I have been able to cling to the hope. And through this hope I have found God’s faithfulness. His goodness. His blessings.
Ultimately, this isn’t the story I would’ve ever chosen for myself. It’s not the story I ever thought I’d be able to withstand. Every day I ache to hold Paige in my arms on this side of eternity. But this is the story that is leading me closer to our God of hope and to eternity spent with Him in the fullness of His glory where my daughter already is. And for that, I am thankful! I will continue to cling to this hope, one day at a time. I pray that if you find yourself in a season of weeping as well, that you find comfort in the hope that our loving Father so freely, lovingly gives.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to His great mercy, He has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen Him, you love Him. Though you do not now see Him, you believe in Him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.”
1 Peter 1:3-9
- Anna
Hope Mom to Paige Abigail
Anna lives in Houston, TX and is a wife to Brendan, mom to hope baby Paige, and preschool teacher to a room full of four-year-olds. She finds joy in traveling with her husband, reading two or three books at a time, and sipping a strong cup of coffee at any local coffee shop. “Choose Hope” is Anna’s motto to live by, and she finds her daily strength through God’s Word and faithfulness.
We would be honored to share your story as a Hope Mom on our blog. On Saturdays we feature Hope Moms’ stories in order to showcase God’s faithfulness even in the midst of such deep sorrow. If you would like to have your story shared on our blog for this purpose, learn more and submit here.
Widget not in any sidebars
Got something to say?